Luann Van Houten

Luann Van Houten (née Mussolini) is the cousin as well as wife of Kirk Van Houten and the mother of Milhouse Van Houten. She has been married to Kirk, divorced due to an argument at one of Homer and Marge's disastrous dinner parties, and later remarried to Kirk.

Biography
Luann is apparently of Italian and Greek descent. Her mother, Sophie, is Italian, although Luann never speaks Italian or is seen with her mother (who remains in Italy with Luann's half-brother, Bastardo). Luann was born in Shelbyville, a town founded on the principle of freedom to marry one's cousins. Her birthday is December 1. She lacks the stereotypical exaggerated mannerisms associated with most other Italian-Americans in Springfield, such as Fat Tony or the chef Luigi Risotto. When younger, she went to "Camp Land-A-Man" (which basically served as a finishing school) with Marge, Patty and Selma, the future Helen Lovejoy (maiden name unknown), and future realtor Cookie Kwan.

Luann was married to her cousin Kirk Van Houten and gave birth to Milhouse. Their marriage came to an unhappy end; after an argument over a game of Pictionary, she leaves Kirk. Although Kirk found single life tough, Luann used her newfound freedom and heretofore stifled promiscuity to live life in the fast lane. Luann began dating American Gladiator Pyro shortly after her divorce, but was caught cheating on Pyro with his (former) best friend, Gyro. It is implied that Luann had a one-night stand with Otto in the episode Moe Letter Blues after Otto tells Kirk "even I hooked up with your old lady" before apologizing to Milhouse, who says that Otto is his "favorite uncle". Even while married to Kirk she attended a key party at which she slept with Dr. Hibbert. Luann also dated Apu, Disco Stu, and Captain McCallister.

When the Van Houtens are on the verge of reuniting, Bart and Milhouse hatch a scheme to get them to separate again (because Milhouse enjoyed their fighting over him and trying to buy his love). The scheme backfires and nearly results in the separation of Homer and Marge. Since then, they are often seen together. After some years, they plan to marry again. Their honeymoon goes terrible when they are lost at sea and stranded on an island, believed to be dead. When they are rescued, they go back to Springfield, fully reconciled.

Even though they utlimately got back together, they are shown to still have some marital issues. For example, in in Bobby, It's Cold Outside, Milhouse admits when reluctantly refusing to jot down Bart's last words that Luann deliberately locked Kirk out of the house and threatened to take away Milhouse's presents if he so much as even tries to let Kirk inside.

Milhouse and his parents all look so much alike that Bart once asked in Luann and Kirk were siblings. In the season 26 episode "Let's Go Fly a Coot", Milhouse reveals that his parents are actually cousins.

Appearance
Luann has bob-cut blue hair and red round glasses. She wears many different outfits. She sometimes wears white pearl earrings. She also had thick blue eyebrows that, according to Kirk, were fake. When in a jacuzzi, a beach or by the pool, she has worn either a one-piece swimsuit or a bikini.


 * She worn a green bikini while wearing a jacuzzi suit in Radioactive Man.
 * She also worn a red bikini and a Red sarong with starfishes in That '90s Show.
 * She also worn a purple swimsuit in Lisa the Veterinarian and The Cad and the Hat.
 * And she also worn a black bikini in Undercover Burns.